This book will always hold a special place in my heart. This is the first comic I ever received and didn't tear to bits after I was done looking at the pictures. I'll never forget it I was probably about 6 or 7, just learning to read, me and my mom were downtown and there was the comic book store and I forced my mom to take me there and I got to pick out two, count 'em, two comics! I got this issue and Green Lantern (I don't know where Green Lantern is...oops). But anyway I love this book for two reasons, one of which is the aforementioned. The other, is it's from the bygone Claremont, Cockrum era. But enough with my nostalgic recollections.Like I said, this issue is written by Chris Claremont and illustrated by David Cockrum, who if I remember correctly just passed away recently, which is a shame. Now, see the first indication you know this is gonna be a good book is the cover I mean look at that, X-men and flash lights, and Kitty Pryde dressed like a slightly less gay Gene Simmons, you know it's goin' down!
This issue starts out as just about every other comic book written by Chris Claremont with a long winded narration explaining the character in the panel and his powers. Professor is contemplating the past battles his X-men have had with their arch-nemesis Magneto. When a dolled up Kitty Pryde come skating in! Making the the Prof. hella pissed. So how does the passive Professor handle the situation he psi-shouts her outta the room, way to handle the stress!
So after allowing Kitty Pryde to become well acquainted with the backside of his left hand, he explains to the X-men that they have to for some reason go on a reconnaissance mission to Magneto's old liar which was built under an active volcano and subsequently destroyed by said volcano. So remember kids when looking for places to set-up shop an active volcano should be avoided I don't care how low the interest is.
So they arrive at the volcano, large flashlights in hand, and decide hey you know what lets split because that makes perfect sense! Kitty why don't you go with Colossus, the man who will later deflower you. So soon enough Garokk, comes along and y'know he's pissed because the X-men threw him into a thermal pit. But in all fairness Storm tried to rescue him, but couldn't because she's claustrophobic, luckily our good buddy Magneto saved at the last second and took the liberty to enlist him to his cause.
Next thing we know Colossus is on the ground unconscious and Kitty Pryde is playing the part of the beach babe to Garokks Jason Vorhees, until she realizes she can hurt him by phasing through him. How sad is that, your a man turned arcane demi-god and your weakness or at least one of them is getting phased through by Rip Taylor's little sister (that's the last of the caddy gay jokes I promise). This really pisses Garokk off so he takes decides to go ahead and smash some shit to create a lava flow. A lava flow which apparently he can now survive but couldn't a few issues ago...hmmm did I miss something, strange I sense some incongruencies could it be, yes, yes it is! It's a plot hole!
So they arrive at the volcano, large flashlights in hand, and decide hey you know what lets split because that makes perfect sense! Kitty why don't you go with Colossus, the man who will later deflower you. So soon enough Garokk, comes along and y'know he's pissed because the X-men threw him into a thermal pit. But in all fairness Storm tried to rescue him, but couldn't because she's claustrophobic, luckily our good buddy Magneto saved at the last second and took the liberty to enlist him to his cause.
Next thing we know Colossus is on the ground unconscious and Kitty Pryde is playing the part of the beach babe to Garokks Jason Vorhees, until she realizes she can hurt him by phasing through him. How sad is that, your a man turned arcane demi-god and your weakness or at least one of them is getting phased through by Rip Taylor's little sister (that's the last of the caddy gay jokes I promise). This really pisses Garokk off so he takes decides to go ahead and smash some shit to create a lava flow. A lava flow which apparently he can now survive but couldn't a few issues ago...hmmm did I miss something, strange I sense some incongruencies could it be, yes, yes it is! It's a plot hole!
Storm senses the change in the temperature, deduces that a lava flow has breached the chamber, so in some classic wind-goddess creativity creates some hurricane force winds and lowers the temperature freezing the place over, how awesome is that!
The X-men realize there has been foul play and discover Colossus' body but where is Ms. Pryde why she decided to phase through the lava flow with some of that classic X-men ingenuity. Garokk goes ahead and makes himself known to the other X-men who are defeated one by one then Garokk takes Storm's now unconscious body make a hole in the crust of the earth a la heat vision and decides to take some revenge, by throwing her limp body down the pit. But not before Kitty Pryde has anything to say about it she wakes up the X-men and they prepare to kick some demi-god ass. Kitty jumps through Garokk make him lose his concentration and night crawler goes ahead bamf's over to try and retrieve Storm from Garokks clutches, but as luck would have it both Garokk and Ororo fall into the pit. Kitty goes down the pit in search of Storm who she finds along with Garokk who lunges at her, but she goes ahead and phases and he falls down his own pit. GOTCHA BITCH!
So they get Storm out of the pit and everybody happy! Until they realize Magneto has really got it out for them. UH OH!
So, like I said before I really enjoyed this issue. I love the Claremont, Cockrum tales of the 70's, 80's good stuff. I just hope you don't expect every review to be this long because it won't be. Also I'll try to get some of the other guys to contribute or something.
NEXT!!! I DO SOMETHING YAY
1 comment:
Awesome. Maybe I willlllll.
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