Occult Hymn, DANGERDOOM.

A free EP available for download through the Adult Swim page linked to above, Occult Hymn is the result of a compilation between eccentric masked artist MF DOOM and Grey Album producer Danger Mouse. It's seven free songs, which seems to be basically because the entire thing is mixed with clips from and names of Adult Swim shows. (The entire first track is Master Shake talking.)

As this is almost all of the DANGERDOOM that I have heard, a good first impression has been made. The last track (Space Ho's) is inexplicably louder than the rest of the album, which gets annoying, as it is the least interesting of the songs.

I was originally somewhat dubious about two of the seven tracks being skits, though they each turned out to be quite entertaining. The first, an introduction to the album by Aqua Teen's Master Shake, confirms my suspicions that whoever the voice of Shake is is kind of a corporate whore. But I would be too. (He was also in one of the InAction Shorts on the View Askew website, leading to my suspicions in the first place.)

The second, featuring Minoriteam's White Shadow, is somewhat reminiscent of "Swingers." The White Shadow attempts to call DANGERDOOM, wanting him to join his evil team. He is then cut off twice by the answering machine, and ultimately decides he doesn't need DANGERDOOM after all. It's funny, but after a while becomes sort of a dragging sections of the album.

I don't think this thing was intended for the repeated playings I have put it through.

Basically, it's hella good for something FREE, and lord knows I love free stuff. I love both MF DOOM and Danger Mouse. The Grey Album was what really got me into rap, more namely into Jay-Z, and I still say St. Elsewhere is one of the best albums I've heard. And, though limited, my exposure to MF DOOM has made me love him as well. Gorillaz' November Has Come, to me, personifies the beauty of rap. It just keeps going, it has no plot or story or anything. It's just rhymes upon rhymes, interspersed with a chorus similar to that of "Feel Good Inc.," only slower.

In short, better than most of the free albums I've gotten while staying within the law.

The Goon 25 Cent Special, Dark Horse Comics (Incomplete)

So, before I actually start I want to thank Ben for keeping this blog afloat for so long. I promise all two of you that read this blog that my posting will become more consistant. I recently fell back into my addiction of World of Warcraft so much MMO goodness!

But, now to the matter at hand!

If you're not familiar with Eric Powell's delightfully vulgar brainchild, The Goon, you've been missing out. Seriously I don't mean to sound like a fanboy but, Eric Powell, is a comedic genius, and his art ain't bad on the eyes either.

300.

I have to start by saying this: Please don't kill me. Between the Eva Mendes-obsessed kids in my Robotics class and the overly-excited kids with the braces, red towels and the wooden swords, EVERYONE seems to love this movie. I don't think I'd stand a chance.

I saw this the day it came out. I was excited. I loved Sin City, thus beginning my love of Frank Miller, and so I was excited about this movie. The fact that Zack Snyder directed it, though not as big a deal, was still incentive for me. I loved his pseudo-remake of "Dawn of the Dead" in 2004, and thus had faith in him. Because the DVD commentary for that movie was quite funny. I like that guy.

I was disappointed. I'm sure I would've loved it more had I not put in the effort to read it the day before, but I was disappointed. For those of you who have not read the comic, almost the entire book takes place on the battlefield. The entire storyline with the queen doing crazy liberating stuff in Sparta was added later, and, though handled well, could not support its own weight all the way through. It seemed like a cliché, ya know: This guy is gone doing something heroic and great, and his lady is supportive, but she has to give herself to another dude to save him or whatever. It seemed dumb. Although there was some awesome payoff at the end, where she's all like, "Bitch!" and stabs him.

Oh yeah. This may sort of ruin some stuff for you if you haven't seen it yet.

Wikipedia refers to this, as well as Sin City, as a "shot-for-shot adaptation of the comic book." This is pretty much as true of this as it is of that, I think, at least as far as what was IN the comic book to begin with.

You will find that pretty much all of my complaints about this movie are about inconsistencies between the book and the movie.

Perhaps it was my commitment to the comic book, perhaps my extreme want to prove to my History teacher that it was at least MODERATELY historically accurate, perhaps an amalgamation of the two, but people I've talked to don't seem to be as bothered by this as I was. There are three big, angry, inexplicable monsters in this movie.

The first is a large rhinoceros-like creature, who is sent charging at the Spartans and killed en route. Now, at first, I tried to defend this in my head by thinking, "Maybe that's just representative of like, the elephants that were shown in the comic or something. Later, there are elephants, in a scene taken directly from the book. So they just threw Mr. McRhinofreak in there for the hell of it.

The second, at right, is much more humanoid. But this does not make him any more excusable. He is a giant angry battle-scarred creature, very much looking like something out of Lord of the Rings. I swear to god, in between the walking trees and the pissed off dead guys, he was in there. This is a big bald thing set upon the Spartans by the Immortals, who have it all chained up, as seen. They send him out there, and of course he fights directly with Leonidas, no one else. He seems not to care about the other 299 or so Spartans out there, with the exception of the two or three that need to be killed for him to get to his only somewhat conspicuous target.

The final and most annoying of these three creatures is a large, puffy creature with claw-like knives for hands. It is only shown for about thirty seconds, simply employed to slice a guy's head off as punishment. He is by far the least like any creature of the real world, and not even used in a battle sequence. If you are going to put a big random monster in there, Zack Snyder, at least use it for something interesting and memorable. Not for half a minute of confusion and bewilderment.

Now, I emphasize my problems with this movie simply because, judging from what I've heard, it is so unanimously LOVED. Sure, it was badass, I did like it a lot. But it was not perfect, and had some things in it that really pissed me off.

I give it a four out of five.

George Lucas, You Shit Bastard.

I own one copy of each of the Star Wars movies. I, II and IV-VI on VHS (the 1997 versions of the original trilogy), and Episode III on DVD. In 2004, Episodes IV-VI were released on DVD, with shiny new CG sequences and scenes added in. There is no DVD available of the ORIGINAL original trilogy.

I don't know that I have ever seen the ORIGINAL trilogy, at least not that I can remember.

In 1997, with the opening of Episode I came the new VHS versions of A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi.
Here is a scene from that version of Episode IV:


And here is what appeared on the one and ONLY DVD release of the film in 2004:


Just compare those two. Just look at one, and then look at the other. Digest it. Let it marinate in your brain.

Han vs. Greedo:
How many shots were fired, and who shot first?

Originally, Han fired the first and only shot. In 1997, Lucas decided he did not like this. He changed it, so that, from about a foot away, Greedo fires and misses, followed by Han shooting and killing Greedo. This was later changed so that the shots were even closer together chronologically, and, finally, in 2004, Han Solo is digitally leaned over, dodging Greedo's shot. This creeps me out.

Now, I see here that a DVD was released in 2006, featuring two versions of at least the first film, and I would guess the two original sequels as well. It has the original theatrical version, as well as the 2004 changes. I hate Lucas less now.